Yeah.
We had a busy day planned. First up, after breakfast, off to the pool, for Joe and the kids, and the gym for me.
My workout was hard because it was the day that I decided to up the weights on the cable machine and increase the distance on the ergonometer. I finished up about 10 minutes before the meet up time. I knew that we were going home for lunch, and but I also knew that the girls really liked the chocolate chip muffins made at the snack kiosk there. I got in line and picked up 2 chocolate chips and one cranberry lemon, for Joe. As I was about to pay, one of the fellows, a middle aged guy, popped his head around the corner and spoke to the woman working there. I heard him say ‘cup’ and ‘I’ll pay you when I leave.’
Now, I had a moment.
I thought this a perfect opportunity to pay it forward and I said, indicating that I already had my money out, “I’ll pay for you coffee, no problem.” He looked startled, and said, “No, it’s okay.” Violating everything I know from being disabled, I said, “I don’t mind.” He looked embarrassed and said “Thanks.” Then he left.
As this was happening I realized that he was just taking a cup to get some water in, not buying a coffee, and then he was going to return to get a coffee. I had just been a bit creepy weird. Anyway, I was in this and so I said to the woman, “Go ahead and add his coffee.” She said, “No you don’t have too.” I told her that I wanted to, I had said I would and I would.
She said that he shouldn’t have stepped in to speak to her when she was serving me. That it took her concentration away from me and I was her customer. I realized she was a bit upset. I thought to myself, “Don’t be offended for me.” I actually said, “I didn’t mind at all.” She said that she did.
I asked her again to pay for his coffee because if I didn’t now I’d just look like an asshole. I mean creepy weird is one thing, and asshole who is creepy weird is scary. But she refused and that was the end of that.
I tried being nice.
I tried to pay it forward.
But instead I messed it all up.
The next time I get that feeling, I’m going to make sure I understand exactly what’s going on and I’m going to listen to ‘no’ if it’s said, and I am not going to be creepy weird.
Who knew that being nice could be so fucking difficult?
